30 going on 13
Hey everyone! I’ve decided to start a blog for several reasons. Primarily, I want to give monthly updates on what’s going on in my life. I also added it as a dynamic element to my website. Since I currently update my website with only art/videos, I thought it would be fun to add a written component. Most importantly, I want to connect with like-minded people. So I hope you enjoy the monthly updates!
I’m turning 30 this month and, honestly, I’m quite excited about it. Normally, I feel odd getting older. I ask myself “Where has the time gone?” and wonder if I’m making the correct decisions for my future. However, I’m excited about turning 30 this month because I feel like I’m “entering a new era” of my life.
My twenties came with some good and bad times. When it came to school, I passed with flying colors. I graduated Magna Cum Laude with a B.S. in Marketing. Another milestone I hit was leasing my first apartment. While it’s in the same apartment building as my Mom, I enjoyed and needed the added responsibility of my space. It made me feel like I was becoming an adult! I worked a variety of jobs across multiple industries. From part-time sales associate at Michaels to full-time frame shop manager at Hobby Lobby, I acquired many different skills. Not to mention I worked in local, retail, corporate, and not-for-profit settings.
Although I acquired many positive experiences, my twenties held some difficult moments. I lost quite a few people during this period. Last year, my estranged father passed away, which left me to deal with the complicated emotions of that event. I also metaphorically lost friends and people I cared about, whether through just “growing apart” or dramatic fallouts. While I’m proud of my degree, I learned it isn’t the “golden ticket (as our society paints it out to be so)” to getting a job. I particularly have struggled after the pandemic to find a day job (despite having a degree that I worked years to obtain) period, let alone one within my field of study. Moreover, I’ve had to examine my failings. I was suppressing my wants and needs at the expense of myself. When I did this, there were a lot of consequences: poor communication with people I care about, letting others take control of my life, agreeing to things that aren’t the best for me, and not living my authentic life. Consequentially, this led to a total reevaluation of my goals and desires for my life.
“While reconnecting with my inner child, I rediscovered my artistic calling. I want to bring the same creative passion I had as a child to the present. ”
I caught myself idealizing my past but realized I didn’t want to live in this place. Throughout my late twenties, I slowly reconnected with my inner child. I loved the creativity as a 13-year-old girl and made so much artwork. However, I know my teenage years weren’t a paradise. My father had a massive stroke, I was bullied during junior high, and our house went into foreclosure. I faced many tribulations, but I learned from the highs and lows. While reconnecting with my inner child, I rediscovered my artistic calling. I want to bring the same creative passion I had as a child to the present.
The focus of my 30s will be to combine my child-like passion for art with the mature wisdom gained from my 20s. As I work towards fulfilling my rediscovered passion, I’m participating in things I’ve enjoyed for the longest time: editing videos, creating characters, and making art. I’m looking forward to continuing all of this in my 30’s.
